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Saturday, July 25, 2009

attention or ignorance..

growing up without a father through out my life,made me an independent girl today..*tough enough* i suppose...with a mother who is very strict on me..we are not like those 'lovy dovy' mother-daughter relationships...we dont really share things inside our heart...so,being the only child fo 15 years, i used to keep my feelings to myself....

sick,sad,mad,happy...all alone inside...its just i do share it with my nenek sumtyms..;)

well, being a very lonely girl throughout my childhood,made me realize...
how important a man is to a woman's life...

she can never stand alone....although most of the times she could...
like who i am today, is becoz of my mother...
but still, i need that someone...
someone who could be there with me..through my hard and easy times...
through sadness and happiness....
i know, im not as great as mother...who could do everything on her own...

i want attention as i hardly get it from mother through out my life...
that's y sometimes i tend to be soo demanding...(i know its bad)...but i want it badly...from the one i love..

today,im 20..
everytime i feel neglected i'll turn to someone...someone who i call my 'bestfriend forever',who means more than the world to me..that SPECIAL SOMEONE..
but sometimes,expecting too much,brings me down.that leads me to a worst feeling of being neglected...;(
sometimes he just couldnt be there for me when i need him most...
cant even do simple things that i KINDLY ASK.
the more i know him, the more i hardly understand.

sad.yeahhhh....get so em0 right now...
y cant we be just like others.HAPPY.UNDERSTAND.

1 comment:

Fauzana said...

Forgive me for always quoting others, Tasha. But there were these words spoken by Anais Nin that I really love.

"How wrong is it for women to expect a man to build the world she wants, rather than set out to create it herself."

I guess those who have experienced love must have their own dreams of how wonderful life would be with the presence of that wonderful someone. I myself must admit that I have felt the same too.

Unfortunately, nothing could make us happy other than our ownselves, sayang. Because the reality is, when bad things happen to us and we are crying alone in our rooms, hoping for someone to save us from our miserable lives, no one would appear out of thin air to put a smile on our face. As sad as it sounds, we are all actually on our own and every thing - from feeling happy to feeling sad and depressed - is up to us.

Saya tahu ini bunyi macam "berat mata memandang, berat lagi bahu memikul."
Tapi Tasha, semua orang ada hari busuk mereka.
And I hope you, my friend, are always optimistic and look at the bright side of things.

Lastly, just nak cakap yang I miss you, mak cik. Please take care ok. Tak sabar tunggu anda balik Msia ;)

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